Killerhillscratchedmypills

THE KILLER HILL RUN 2010 (thats the year not the run number)

(attached is evidence that there really is a killer hill in Eastwood)

Karma was very wise to stay home and look after those lovely legs of hers, first late comer - Running Bear - took one look at hill number one - then decided it was less stressful to go play with traffic on Victoria Road; the second late comer -or did they come together - Ashmore stayed rugged up and listened to the footie on his car wireless. WANKERS - not you Karma.

The pack gathered – ho de hum – the RA formed the circle and introductions were made - there was a visitor from the Solomon Islands – Serial Killer - how appropriate on the night of the Killer run – 2 more visitors were to join this Killer run later.

Instructions were given by TART and his newly appointed co-hare In Quick. In Quick and a TART there has to be something said for that feel good relationship. TART handed out maps - Trust Me was beside himself (just the two of him) when he found to his horror the maps were laminated – thought it might have been raining lamented TART. Acting Trail Master Trust Me found the stiffness not to his liking - rubbing through his pocket onto the inside of his leg.

Off the pack set, runners and walkers together till they passed the railway station at Cheltham then THE split. One hill after another. . . . then something different another hill, bushland and steps, down down - up up. Out of the bush onto more streets and more hills. The runners walkers crossed over – cant be too much further but it was. There was a cry ‘are you’ and out of the mist stepped two foreign spies – Local Knowledge from the UK and JustChris all the way from Fairlight, Sydneys Northern Beaches. They were also late coming together but caught up with the pack with some ingenious short cuts and no local knowledge.

When it looked like the Killer Hill was just a TART fantasy there it was – ohh ahh’s were exclaimed then up up up and a most magnificent sight to behold – TART and In Quick with the resuscitation package – oxygen - port/lollies/lemonade - an esky full of ice – how thoughtful on a cold night. AllDay proceeded to open the lemonade only to have it spray all over Hand Job - must have been the high altitude – AllDay removed the offending liquid from Hand Jobs clothing and body parts the best he could.

The hashers admired the city lights of EastWood – then it was off – walkers runners together. Trust Me with his laminated map used his genious and chalk to mark a long runner trail to on home. The walkers set off at a fast pace - needed a run up to get down the first hill.

On on and on home. Well set run - walkers/runners getting to the bucket within 10 minutes of each other. At the bucket Local Knowledge noticed he had slashed his tyre mmmm - how many hashers does it take to change a tyre!

The circle formed and the RA called for the walkers report - Ossie expressed himself admirably and gave the run a number out of 10. Running Bear was called to give the runners report - in true RB's reporting style it appeared that RB was somewhere else tonight - he is a volunteer for the hash trash make-it-up-as-you-go writers wrag reporter for the year 2011. A score was a 10+ for an excellent virgin run set by a non-virgin in virgin Wanderer Territory. A down down to the hare and his happy helper IQ. The visitors were welcomed. Down downs to the late comers, RB and Ashmore. A down down from Hand Job to TART and In Quick for same sex love letters. Fookawee did a fine job as acting song mistress, the assistant male beer wench persisted when others would have given up and hash flash #2 AhSole was a happy snapper. It was discovered all too late that the Prick T Shirt was still in its fumigation bag courtesy of Australian Customs.

Then it was on off to the West Ryde hotel for the onon - but they heard there were rabble rousers approaching and quickly locked and barred the doors. The search was on for an alternative onon - one was found in the form of the West Ryde Chinese Restaurant - best chinese food this side of China - which just happened to be right next door to the adult fun shop Funtasia. Much frivolity prevailed at the onon then it was on over. Here endeth another funtastic Wanderers night of hashing.

onon

Anon the Writer